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A soul, split in two, each half left to wander alone in the empty and dark spaces of my psyche, each fully aware of the other’s existence. A gemini. I respectfully observe what each has to say. They fight for my attention; their voices often clamouring and their beseeching words quickening in aggression, to the point where nothing but white noise engulfs me.
And I know that the only way to alleviate the horror and pacify the two voices, is for me to make a decision, thus satisfying the desire of one, and silencing the other.
Each day is a battle between the simple and the complex; the rational and irrational, good, evil, light, dark, death, life. And this battle becomes all consuming. I fight with myself, the ‘I’ disguised as a difference of opinion, or an unfamiliar emotion. I am torn between the two, and often I am unable to differentiate between the two voices, each lovingly whispering that they both stand for my best interest.
I crave silence. Why can’t I find harmony? A symmetry and an agreement within myself, the way the ocean does with the sun each day, as the sun melts into it’s horizon, accepting of compromise. I am dual and I must compromise. And so I close my eyes, let the light play behind my eyelids as I fully hand myself over to the voices which talk in paradoxes; ambiguous riddles, and I laugh, and I accept.